#CHURCHTALK 10: What is the Cost of Anger?

Anger is an emotion that hardly admits the necessity of definition, since we all can testify to having felt this emotion at one time or the other.

Although the above statement is generally true, we are going to give a simple but precise definition of anger, to ensure that the emotional state to which this article refers is clearly identifiable by all. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines anger as “a strong feeling of displeasure and usually of antagonism”.

This definition is sufficiently simple, and it is about this emotion we shall be discussing in this edition of #ChurchTalk, but must necessarily add a qualifier—that the mere emotional feeling of anger is not sinful in itself, because sin always consists of a volition; a voluntary choice of a state of heart, will, thought or action.

It is often the case that during human interactions and arguments, one party feels that the other party is being unnecessarily angry, while the other party either feels he is not angry or is justified in his anger. This seems to arise from the fact that anger as an emotion is often undesired and generally disagreeable.

The purpose of this article is to understand this phenomenon fundamentally, and answer certain crucial questions, drawing wisdom from the teachings of the Holy Scriptures. We have just noted that anger is often undesired and generally disagreeable.

With this statement, we expect many to agree, but we must here probe even further; is this always the case? Are there situations in which it is right, or even a duty to get angry? Are there limits to anger? Are there alternatives to anger? At what point does self-expression ever become an affront to God or man?

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Is it Right to get Angry?
There are perhaps hundreds of verses in the scriptures that speak on the subject of anger, many of which portray it in a negative light. For the sake of brevity, we shall however highlight three passages which are quite representative of the scriptural teachings on the propriety or impropriety of anger:

Ephesians 4:26-27 [KJV] 
26. Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
27. Neither give place to the devil.

This scripture clearly points to the fact that anger, in itself, is permissible to the Christian, but should not lead to sin, and should be under his/her control. However, to understand this, a contextual examination of the preceeding verses (22-25) is necessary.

In the preceeding verses, Paul was talking about putting off the old man and putting on the new man. Then, he started giving examples. Between verses 25 and 32, he constantly mentions elements of the old man and the contrasting new man qualities that we should replace them with. He mentions lying/truth in verse 25, stealing/laboring for your own sustenance in verse 28, corrupt communication/edifying speech in verse 29, etc.

But, in verse 26, he doesn't speak of anger in terms of having a replacement. Rather, he speaks of its permissiblity and the control that we should have over it. Since anger is often a result of the violation of our conscious sensibilities and also our conscience, this is understood.

"Be angry...", he says. The word 'anger' here comes from the Greek word 'orgizo', which means 'to provoke or enrage'. He is saying that we can get provoked or enraged as a natural emotion that does not necessarily have to do with the old man or new man. This natural emotion is akin to that of sexual drive or libido. It is natural and can be aroused; and it's arousal is not necessarily sinful in itself. Rather, it proves your humanity and reflects God's creation in you, for God made you so.

But there's a caveat: "Be angry, and sin not". He seems to be making the point here that we should express our human feelings of provocation or anger, but to ensure that we do nothing wrong while doing so. Bottled-up emotions are never the best for human beings, especially in relationship to God or our fellow human beings. For God has created us with the freedom of expression so that we may use that as a tool to meaningfully relate with others, and to assert to ourselves our true nature by recognizing the way(s) we truly feel. In the worship of God, it is deceptive to deny to yourself how you truly feel. For in doing so, we make no room for true fellowship with God, His values, and for genuine change.

"...let not the sun go down upon your wrath", he says. Wrath here comes from the Greek word 'parorgismos', which means 'rage'. It's a strong feeling of anger that is difficult to control. When orgizo (provocation) is entertained and grown, it becomes stronger and more uncontrollable. This is why he says we should not allow it to last throughout the day. In other words, provocation should never be entertained or allowed to get to the point where you have no more control over it; for sin will then be the result as it was with Moses in the old testament. The lack of control is not a fruit of the Spirit of God; but self-control is.

"Neither give place to the devil", he says. With this statement, Paul seems to be making it abundantly clear that we can be angry, but should remain under control when angry. The hallmark then, of a person who has put-off the old man is his capacity to remain in control even when angry. He has this control because of his submission to the Spirit of God in him. The devil will have no place except that which we give him. So, we should remain in charge.

Finally on this note, in making this statement, Paul was actually quoting King David in Pslams 4:4.

Psalms 4:4
4. Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah.

"Awe" here comes from the Hebrew word 'ragaz', which means 'to quiver with any violent emotion, especially anger or fear'
Here, however, David further gives us the perfect idea on how not to sin when angry: He says, "commune with your own heart and be still".

Quite simply and in a nutshell, by all means, express yourself when angry. Let it out. Bottling anger up creates a room for animosity, leading to bitterness of heart. So, express it by telling the person who has offended you, or talking about what has offended you. And be sure to be honest while doing so too; for 'with the mouth, confession is made unto salvation'. Jesus was not against being offended with your brother. He only said that if you're offended with your brother, you should go and tell him. But, lacking control when angry is a sign of lacking the fruit of the Spirit of God which is self-control; and that is a sure pathway to sin.

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Matthew 5:22
But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment…

Love is the central commandment of the new testament. Love results in a feeling of good pleasure or warmth towards those around you. If you have a feeling of displeasure towards them without any cause, Jesus says you're in danger of being accused or brought to trial/tribunal. The Greek word for 'judgment' in that verse means 'tribunal or accusation'. Remember that the devil is the accuser of the brethren?

So, when we are angry with anyone for no reason, we give the devil a chance to lay an accusation against us. Notice that the accusation is not just because of the anger; but because the anger has no reason. Anger without reason smacks of witchcraft. It causes undue hindrance or harm to the subject emotionally and otherwise (anger is emotionally draining). And also seeks to cause undue hindrance or harm to the object too in other ways.

James 1:19
So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath

This verse gives what should be our first and general approach to getting angry or provoked.

'Wrath' here comes from the Greek word 'orge', which translates to 'violent passion, ire or justifiable abhorrence'. Note that the abhorrence is a justifiable one. So, the anger here has reason. But, Apostle James says, even when your abhorrence of something or someone is justifiable, be slow to entertain it or act on it.

First of all, this smacks of having self-control, and revalidates what is said in Ephesians 4:26. Secondly, it suggests that there could be other ways of handling that abhorrence, other than getting angry. And thirdly, it means that you can also choose not to get angry, even in the face of that abhorrence.

I have often found out in life that the wrong things people often do, though often willfully done, are mostly as a result if various other factors which could be intellectual, psychological, spiritual, etc. And so, often, rushing into anger because of what they did may actually not be the smart or productive thing to do, especially if you look at it from the angle of love. If you are in control of your own emotions, you should make these assessments before giving room to your anger. Be slow to it. That is the first and general rule to anger.

This means that for a Christian who battles with anger, they should not pray to not get angry again. Rather, they should pray for the fruit of self-control, and also study the word of God in order to develop the capacity to think like God, specifically to see people and their actions in the way God sees them. Then they'll be able to assess things properly before entertaining anger or not. Self control is the key.

There are other passages that include anger among the sins that must be desisted from by the saints, cf. Ephesians 4:31, Colossians 3:8; and in Colossians 3:21, fathers are commanded not to provoke their children to anger.

Ephesians 4:31
31. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

Bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor and evil speaking mentioned here can be represented using one word—acrimony— because the Greek word used for 'and' in-between them is copulative.

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Merriam-Webster's defines acrimony as "harsh or biting sharpness especially of words, manner, or disposition". Acrimony is not to be controlled. It is to be put away, because it is rooted in selfishness and pride and does not seek to repair but to damage, cause injury, or extract vengeance. All these are not of righteousness in the new man.

An acrimonious or angry heart will invariably breed malicious feelings, and sometimes outright malice. Those feelings should be rejected and summarily put away by any means. They are not of the new man.

Hence, we see in the scripture that we are commanded to beware of anger, be slow to anger, be angry and sin not, etc. It therefore means that there are certain situations in which anger is prohibited, and certain other situations in which it is permitted within certain bounds, and sometimes even our duty. We shall consider each of these situations briefly.

1.   Situations in which a Christian is not expected to act angrily: We are absolutely forbidden from acting angrily when we are personally grieved, insulted or injured. This is because of two reasons: (a) the exact state of heart which we are commanded to possess at such times is diametrically opposed to anger; (b) taking revenge or acting angrily to extract justice is God's exclusive right which He shares with no one else. (Matthew 5:38-48, Romans 12:18-21). Manifesting anger in such situations would amount to selfishness—preference of one’s personal indulgence over that which is on the whole proper, reasonable and above all, commanded by God.

2.   Situations in which anger is permitted:
Mark 3:5 
35. And when He had looked around at them with anger, being grieved by the hardness of their hearts…

The above scripture is a good illustration of righteous and holy anger, being displayed by our Lord and Master Jesus Christ. This was righteous anger displayed by Christ against the Pharisees who did not want Christ to heal a man with a withered hand on the Sabbath day.

We observe that Christ had no personal grievances against them. He was only grieved by the hardness of their hearts. Christ never got angry when He was spited, slapped, beaten and cruelly treated, but He was angry at the wickedness of these hypocrites.

There are certain situations in which a Christian is permitted, and sometimes even obliged by the Holy Spirit, to be angry. For instance, it would be quite difficult to find a Christian man who will not be angry if he returns home from work only to discover that his house has been broken into and his wife molested. Such anger is proper and reasonable but must be controlled (Ephesians 4:26).

Christians are also permitted, and in some cases even prompted by the Holy Spirit, to be angry in a self-controlled manner at the activities of the evil workers against the work of God (Acts 13:9-10), unrighteousness and hypocrisy in the house of God (Mark 11:15-17, Nehemiah 13:1-8,), situations in which the name and honor of God is insulted (Psalm 106:26-31), etc. Most of these situations involve the honor of God and the kingdom of God and not personal axes to grind.

See also: #CHURCHTALK 07: IS CORONAVIRUS OUTBREAK A SIGN OF THE COMING OF JESUS CHRIST AND OF THE END OF THE WORLD?

Are there limits to anger?
We have seen that anger is permitted under certain circumstances. It is also true that there are limits to anger even in these circumstances. This is because anger is essentially an emotion, and if not properly controlled, can get out of hand. The Bible teaches that one of the fruit of the Spirit is self-control.

Any justifiable indignation must be justified both in its cause and its extent. This is where the grace of God is needed, lest we fall into the snare of the devil, and having started in the Spirit, end up in the flesh. Hence the instruction in James 1:19 “…slow to speak, slow to wrath”. The command to be slow to speak is even more pertinent when we notice that we are upset.

At what point does self-expression become an affront to God or man?
When we fail to respect the dignity of a human being as one created in the image of God, we will be in a great error, no matter how justified we may feel in letting loose our feelings, as a situation may seem to demand in the heat of emotions.

1 Peter 2:17
17. Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king. 

1 Peter 2:17 teaches us to honor all people. When we do not respect the image of God being borne by an individual we not only dishonour such an individual, we dishonour God. Hence, the use of foul language in addressing people is prohibited no matter how justified one may feel by a particular situation. As Christians, we must never use any unedifying word or display any derogatory gesture at others, including body-shaming them. Ephesians 4:29.

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Are there alternatives to anger?
Thankfully, as Christians there are always alternatives to anger, especially when we are wronged. One very effective means, particularly effective in the body of Christ, is private settling of disputes firstly before the involvement of a third party.

Matthew 18:15-17 [KJV] 
15. Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 
16. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 
17. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. 

We should be more willing to approach a person to explain how we feel about the way he/she has treated us, than to tell another person. We are also admonished to forbear: “…bearing with one another in love…” (Ephesians 4:1), “…why would you not rather accept wrong? Why do you not rather let yourselves be cheated?” 1Corinthians 6:8. These commands may sound strange to the non-believer, but it is possible to live by them by the grace of God when we have received the newness of life in Christ; especially since we have been told by our master Himself that “It is impossible that no offences should come…” Luke 17:1.

Hence we must always be prepared for offences. If we must overcome anger, we must look beyond the offence and look to our Lord Jesus Christ, our perfect example (Hebrews 12:2). If we do not wish to be offended by people, we ourselves must do our best not to offend others as well.

Matthew 7:12
12. Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. 



Kola Ehinmoro, a petroleum engineer, writes from Port Harcourt, Nigeria. 

Chukwubuikem Paul Anunaso contributed to this article.